Only the Lonely ... or the Desperate
It's humorous Saturday so nothing serious. In my newly single status, I have encountered so many different ways men try to meet or pick up on me. I find the biggest offenses seem to almost always involve social media or at the very least something electronic. Here are my top 5 picks that we'll sarcastically call: who are you kidding? Here it goes from the bad to the worst:
- "Hi" -- who ever thought that monosyllabic "hi" was somehow a great conversation starter. Just so you know ... where exactly can I take "hi"? Seems to me not very far.
- Texting a stranger with "how are you?" It should be more like, don't text a stranger at all. Don't ask me how I am when I have no clue in the world who the hell you are. And why I am responding to some random strange guy from area code 209 is beyond me.
- Posting wine, roses, love cups or anything else completely random on my FB wall. Let me back up ... I don't even know you and you're posting stuff on my page. I don't think so.
- Texting me after midnight -- never, ever, don't do it (I don't care if you're in China). Even if we are dating, don't do it. You will land in the no-go category. It's disrespectful, and believe me when I say, "I don't do booty calls -- EVER!"
- Telling me I'm sexy and you want to do me -- and we've never met. UM NO!!! Or better yet, here is the whopper heard round the world, "You're gorgeous! Would you marry me?" Hmm ... let me give you a monosyllabic, "No!"
And there you go my friend: My top 5 worst offenses in the dating world. And yes, all of those did indeed involve electronic devices LOL. Now go have a great day.
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