First Word

Since I got divorced in 2012, I have been on a personal journey to find not just love, but true love a la Cinderella style. I know many "feminists" are not going to like what I have to say in this article. I'm not trying to please anyone or make a political statement. I'm going to talk about what is basic to relationships and love. I've reached these conclusions not by reading books, which I have read many self-help books, but by experience.  I will start with some points (these are points not rules).   Looking to be completed by a man, forget about it ? I'm not looking for the "you-complete-me" line -- and I'm not thinking I would want to hear it. Looking outside of yourself for completion has nothing to do with real love. If you look outside instead of inside you're very likely to never feel peace of mind. Although I don't like telling women what has become the "bubblegum" advice from dating sites, which is like Field o...

Continuing my little advice column (from a woman's perspective after having read about from a man's perspective). I want to continue to provide insight I have learned from reading, experience and "hands-on experience." I have never had trouble getting men to commit to a serious relationship, which has always begged the question of what I do that other women don't do. After reading and trying different approaches I noticed certain results that work and other results that don't work ... so here we go on some new tips (remember: I will be creating a Romance blog in the near future). The chase is on the wrong foot . I know the "rules" and some women just eschew the rules. These are the same women who don't get their guys. So something is to be said about the rules. So I have a friend whose ex-lover does the pursuit. I wanted to grab this gal and tell her the one thing every girl's mama should tell her: don't chase the guy ! If your man has ...

So I've signed up for those relationship advice newsletters. You know the ones -- Christian Carter and the like. He gives advice from the man's perspective for women, which I think is valuable given that a woman giving women advice about how men think probably doesn't work. I'll tell you before I get into my little "advice" (I use that word loosely) column that my only experience is my own. I've read all of the books over the years among them the famous Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus ; I've sat in the therapist's chair; I've done all of it. Here is the thing: I don't have trouble getting men to commit to me. I've never really had that problem per se. My problems go more in line with getting them and being happy with them. Getting what I want and need from my man without driving him crazy -- that would be my issue. So, what I'm going to say about "attraction" and commitment is from experience and the ability to att...