I know that professionally I value myself. I have always put up high standards. I know our products at 3L Publishing stand head and shoulders above the rest. Where I have failed to value myself is in my personal life. My former boyfriend constantly encourages me to value who I am. Of course, we're still very close. He values me. He once told me (and I thought it was an interesting way to think about it) that he didn't mind that we still went out all the time to do things. I suggested this might crimp his ability to get a date. He replied, "It never hurts to have a beautiful woman on your arm." I smiled.
Why if he values my very presence with him do I not value myself? I need to value who I am. I need to transfer the same self-confidence I have in business to my personal life. And if you're a woman and you perhaps do value yourself personally, but you don't professionally and you don't make the kind of money you deserve, then reverse this thought. Have the self-confidence you need to succeed.
Here are some ideas to help build confidence:
- Wake up every day and say something positive to yourself in the mirror. Perhaps you might say, "I am worth it!" that's a good start.
- Find a mantra to affirm your value and self-worth. Use that mantra on a daily basis. "I am a worthy, smart and beautiful woman, and any man is lucky to have me. I expect to be treated with respect, kindness and love." or "I am a worthy, smart and resourceful woman, anyone who works with me is lucky. I treat everyone with respect and I expect to be treated the same."
- Assert your worth. If someone mistreats you then assert your worth. You don't have to be a doormat. You can say how you feel as long as you don't assign blame.