Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Today is the First Day of the Rest of My Life

I don't know maybe it's continuous sleep for over a week now. Maybe it's energies colliding. Maybe it's the shifts in my life. Maybe it's my love who set me free to finish an ugly process. Maybe it's all of these things colliding, mixing and becoming my reinvented, refreshed and renewed self. I am feeling ready to conquer the world! I feel alive again. It started last March and while there were some great "gifts" that came through, the difficulties dog piled on me with non-stop and painful drops of rain. This revelry is reflection and return and poetry ... ode to the conscious part of self. I've always guarded my private world pretty well, but in the last few moments, readers have become aware of my life more and more. The specifics still heavily vaulted. The darkness rises. The light comes in as barely cracks through the shudders -- and then the window opens in half and onto completeness. I'm at half with forward motion toward full. I did some monumental things this morning to let the light in more. I am now even more self-aware of what I did to keep the blinds closed on someone I hold dear. And you all now know, it's not easy to make changes. It's not easy to make huge leaps. It's not easy to reinvent and to become ... and as my love knows ... to finally "be" ... not be in love or in lust ... to be present! To be in my own skin and to "be" happy with myself! It is as the movie title suggested only in the best sense: The "Bearable" Lightness of Being!

I want to publicly acknowledge my love who actually truly allowed me (not us) to be! My gratitude and love for him is bottomless and overflowing with appreciation. So few real "men" or even human beings would have granted something so needed, so selfless and so necessary. Cheers! And know, there is a second level of "to be" coming ...

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