Thursday, May 16, 2013

A Wise Man Says ... or Ode to Kirk

Yours truly with Kirk Donnelly at Wright's Beach.
My fiancé and I are making all sorts of plans and dreaming about our future and what we want. I was feeling rather discouraged and sniffed that at my age the fact that I no longer owned a home was depressing. I gave up a lot of different things in the divorce ("things" being the operative word). To gain my freedom, I had to free myself of essentially my material world -- a world I worked equally as hard to build as my ex-husband and yet had to give up. My brilliant, sensitive and caring fiancé slept on my lament and woke up this morning and said I needed to give myself a break. The divorce wasn't even final a year, and it takes time to rebuild.

His last thought, "And you have love." 

When I left my other life, I went on walk-about and then I sat back and let love find me. Kirk found me. I left my marriage to find love. Not the kind of love where the other person doesn't want to be with you. Not the kind of love where it's okay to be yelled at or demeaned under the guise of anger. Not the kind of love where the sweetness and caring has drifted into silent resentment. No, I wanted the kind of love where my man would be my true best friend. A love filled with laughter and passion. A love that would survive until the the sun of our lives set. I found that kind of love!

In the end what I've learned is that the material world will never bring you happiness. You can only fill your empty hole and make yourself happy. And when you can make yourself happy you can make someone else even happier to be with you!

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