Friday Morning Musings: Notes for the Control Freak in all of Us

I have a confession: I periodically get depressed. My cycle influences that depression, too. I am normally an upbeat, positive person, but I definitely get struck by sadness and uncertainty. I'm one of those people who likes to know where the road is going in life and when things start to as I put it yesterday "drift" along, I find hard to let go and just see where life is going to take me. So for all of you "control freaks" out there, here is what I've learned and let's see if it helps.

Control is an illusion: you all know that don't you? As humans we think we're mighty and in control. Reality is control works like this: I can control my thoughts, actions and behavior. The rest ... strictly up to God or the other person. You can't make anybody do anything. The ideal is for that person to want to do things. You can set up conditions where the other person will want to do something, but that is all. Thinking that you can control everything is a one-way ticket to frustration and disappointment.

Go with the flow: that requires you literally have to be willing to get into the steam of life and let go. Letting go is another supremely difficult reality for Type A personalities. Flow is just see what happens and accept the results. Sometimes that means waiting for things to come to you. Think of it this way: put your hand out with something "sweet" and see what comes.

Make your life what you want it to be: keep building your life in a positive direction. Visualize what you want your life to look like. Then take action to make your life be the way you want it to be. Field of dreams, build it and they will come. Build the life you want and the rest will come along. Try it you'll be surprised.

If you feel sad like I do then sometimes give yourself a bone:

  • Go get a pedicure
  • If you like a treat (sugar or salt LOL), go get one and enjoy it
  • Go meet friends for lunch and dinner and don't talk serious
  • Laugh! Laughing cures everything
  • Go get a massage
  • Take a walk
  • Play with your pet or children
  • Take a quick vacation somewhere relaxing

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